rings and purebloods
by narutoprincessauthor
Summary: she's the smartest girl in school and she just inherited a valuable ring from her mother that has been passed down in her family for five generations. but in one swift and unfortunate moment. the meanest boy in school happens to swallow it! a hilarious story about trying to reclaim the ring. -completed!
1. Chapter 1

"Hermoine, be careful." My moms voice rang out in my head. I knew exactly what she meant. Not about me going to wizard school but about the ring. She had given it to me before saying goodbye. I've been admiring it ever since. It really was beautiful. Sterling silver with a bright green gemstone in the middle. I loved it so much I had dazed off halfway into transfiguration! I was so ashamed of myself. "Hermoine? Are you ok?" a familiar voice rang out. "Yea harry I'm fine." I sigh. No body had noticed my ring. Suddenly I heard a sharp voice. "Granger, I would like you to demonstrate the lesson I have just explained." I gulped. I hadn't been listening. I had no choice but to walk up to the front of the class and stand there. I looked at harry. He pointed at my left and made a quick flapping motion with his hands. I noticed the apple in front of me and quickly transfigured it into a bird. The class clapped. "Thank you miss granger. But please do be a bit quicker next time." Miss McGonagall said to me. I sat back in my seat and sulked.

"Thanks." I whisper to harry. "No problem." He whispers back. I sigh loudly and refocus on the lesson but it wasn't long before an annoying voice rang out. "What happened mudblood? Nervous you couldn't do a basic transfiguration?" I turn around. "Shut up malfoy!" my cheeks where flaming. And I couldn't suppress my anger. I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Ron. I fad forgotten he was right beside me. "Don't let him get to you. I bet he couldn't have done that spell anyway." I smile at him because I knew he was right. "Say! Nice ring there! can I see it?" he doesn't wait for my answer. He grabs my hand and tries to full off the ring. Unfortunately it was a tight fit so he was really pulling, "Ouch, Ron! Let go!" I said in pain. "come on. One more pull and it's off!"

I try to pull my hand away. "I said, LET GO!." I yank my hand back and to my horror. The ring goes flying. Ron ducks to avoid my slap but I keep one eye on my ring. Which I saw terrifyingly fly right into malfoy's mouth! He choked of a second and then I heard him swallow it. My heart stopped. "What in the bloody hell was that." He whispers out loud. I attempt another slap at rons head. "You idiot." I say out loud. "do you know where the ring went?" he rubbed his head before answering, "No." I let out a long, shuddery sigh. "Well, it's best you didn't know." I say back to him. I was right about to make a huge scene when ms McGonagall's sharp voice rang out, "Granger! This is most unlike you! Please be quiet as we continue the lesson!" I sigh again as malfoy laughs loudly. "just wait, I think to myself. "I'll get him in the hallway after class. And I'll blow him up if I have to.


	2. Chapter 2

Waiting for transfiguration to be over was like waiting for a death sentence. It felt terrible. i Hated ron for trying to take off the ring and I hate Malfoy for swallowing it.

How do you even do that! I'm sure it would have gotten stuck in his throat or something.

Everything seemed to bug me today. Even when Ron kept asking what happened to the ring I didn't tell him. I didn't need him making stuff worse. The rest of transfiguration was boring, Except for me, rubbing my finger in which the ring had been painfully pulled off. It had taken ten minutes to put it on when I first got it. But I still loved it. Oh how I wish I could just blow Malfoy up and just solve two problems at once. That sounded fantastic. but when I saw the real Malfoy walking alone in the hall I quickly cornered him."Malfoy! I shouted in rage at him. "Do you know what happened in transfiguration today!" he looks at me with narrowed eyes. ""what's it to you, mudblood." He answered. "Because…" I shouted again, "You swallowed a ring that has been in my family for five generations! My great-great grandmother owned that ring and you swallowed it!" he stared at me, his eyes suddenly wide with fear. "You're kidding." He stammers. I saw his face go white. "And I might just make you explode if I have to." I pull out my wand and point it at his head. But the look of sheer terror on his face was enough. I lowered my wand. "Fortunately I wont." I tell him. "We're going to madam pomferey's hospital wing to see if there's anything she can do." But after I finish the sentence he dashes off. The chicken. I easily caught up with him and I grabbed a handful of his hair. "Ow… Oww. Mudblood let go." He shouts but I drag him through the halls anyway. It's the only way I can assure he's not going to make a run for it again. When we reach the hospital wing I let go of his hair and push him inside. Madam pomferey immediately questions us. "what happened?" "how?" "any pain." It was annoying but once she heard everything she made malfoy sit on one of the beds. "Do you feel the ring inside of you boy.?" It was one of the weirdest questions I've ever heard. But he answered, "yes actually. I feels like its in the pit of my stomach." I roll my eyes. He was probably lying. But I heard miss pomferey with her idea. "We could try the summoning charm!" the pulls out her wand and shouts "accico, ring." a loud screaming echos the hospital wing with Malfoy's shouts of, "Stop the spell! Stop the spell! Its going to rip my stomach wall." Miss pomferey stops the spell and malfoy was left groaning with his hands over his stomach. "Oh, dear I believe I've made our problem worse." She runs over and felt Malfoys stomach. "Oh, my I did. The ring was in his stomach but I guess the summoning charm pushed the ring farther down in his organs. So I'm araid we can no longer make him vomit the ring up." Malfoy's face went green. And my face went white. "Then why didn't you try that first!" I shout.

"I'm sorry. It didn't occur to me at the moment. But there is one bit of good news! Hermoine the ring was made of sterling sliver right?" I look up and respond, "yea, why?" she looked at me with a smile, "sterling silver cant be digested!" I roll my eyes. "yea, real good news."


	3. Chapter 3

Undecided by madam pomfery what to do, I kept shooting malfoy dirty looks. His face was still white. It was unbelievable. This stupid mess! And why did it have to be malfoy? I would give all the galleons I ever owned for it to be someone I don't hate with all my heart. My bitter thoughts where cleared when I thought of a way to make Malfoy miserable too. I got up and tapped madam pomfery's shoulder. "Are you sure we can't make him throw it up? I mean, we could try?" she looked a bit undecided. "my opinion is that it cant be done but I'm afraid we have no choice but to try." I looked over at Malfoy. His eyes filled with a mixture of hate, fear and reluctance. She walked over and asked Malfoy, "You don't mind do you? We need the ring and this appears to be the best way." All the way from across the hospital wing I heard Malfoy's shouts, "I do mind! I won't stand to be made sick on purpose for a stupid ring! This is not acceptable!" I just shake my head. He is so darn stubborn! I walk over to where he was and started shouting, "you stubborn idiot! Just get it over with. That ring is terribly important and I will not stand having it being stuck in the body of a selfish little brat!" I pant out loud and push the hair out of my face. I felt hot and irritated. But it had worked. Malfoy was so scared of me he didn't care about the misery he had to go through. "What do I have to do then?" I turn and nod to madam pomfery. She looked stern, probably because I shouted, but I didn't care. She handed him a white pill and a glass of water. He looked at the pill in disgust. "I hate you mudblood." He eyes me as he pops the pill in his mouth and drinks the water. Miss pomferey had propped a bucket next to him but man it happened fast! Almost as soon as he swallowed the pill he was throwing up in the bucket. I turned away because it was disgusting. My poor ring. Oh how I wish I could just redo this morning. I would have left the ring on my dresser. So this never would have happened. And what's worse, I'll have known it was swallowed by malfoy so I would be really pushed if I was to wear it again. That would be a nice story, "dear grandchildren, I leave you this ring that was swallowed by a selfish stubborn jerk." That would be a nice story. NOT. It must have been a powerful pill, because malfoy was throwing up even after half an hour. I would have thought his stomach would have been empty. I go up to miss pomfery. "How exactly does that pill work." She started telling me as if it were cold medicine. "the pill basically forces everything in you're stomach to be brought up and it even forces newly created stomach acid to be thrown up." I shudder. "That's really gross." She looked annoyed. "Yes but it is the best option to get you're ring back and I wouldn't complain if I were you. We could be using a lot worse methods!" I shudder again. Then prayed to god my ring came up soon.

After another ten minutes malfoy stopped throwing up and miss pomferey examined the empty bucket. "it has an emptying charm." She explained quickly. But she looked over at me and shook her head. "I'm sorry Hermoine, no ring."

I hate you god.


	4. Chapter 4

"Not there! How is it not there?" I cried over and over. This could not be happening. Madam Pomferey tried to calm me down. "Hermione please stop shouting. I did tell you it probably wouldn't work." I took a few deep breaths. "Okay, it didn't work. What do we do now?" madam Pomferey seemed reluctant to answer.

"Well, there are really two options left. The first being to admit Malfoy to a hospital and have an operation done." Malfoy cringed at the words _operation,_ she continued. "And the second would be for nature to take its course and have the ring exit Malfoys body naturally." This time both the faces of Malfoy and I went green. This was really not my day. Madam Pomferey still continued,

"To be frank, I really would like to avoid an operation unless absolutely necessary, and since the ring would not be damaged, option two would be better." Malfoy and I both had something to say about that. "Madam Pomferey, this really isn't very fair, I mean I will never wear a ring that's been through the guts of him! And that ring is my prized possession. I don't want it ruined!" I was almost at the peak of my rage and embarrassment meters. Next Malfoy started his rant. "Madam pomferey this is not right. I'm scared of hospitals, but the second option would be terribly unpleasant for both hermoine and I so please, is there any other way?" she paused for a few moments thinking, "No I'm sorry there is no other way and I understand this predicament for the both of you, just try to cope please?" both Malfoy and my own faces were very red. Miss Pomferey had Malfoy lay down again so she could roughly tell where the ring was. For once I got a smile out that day just by watching Malfoys look of discomfort. She let him get up after around five minutes then sighed. "Judging by where I felt the ring it will be around tomorrow for it to come out naturally." Again my face went green and Malfoy looked terribly uncomfortable. "Miss Pomferey, do we have to go through this?!" I cried desperately, but they were useless. Miss Pomferey had made up her mind. "I'm sorry Hermione I will not admit him to a hospital when there is a safer option." I take in a big breath; I was not giving up yet. "It may be safer but it sure as heck is grosser!"

She let out a long sigh. "Yes Hermione I know. I admit it is not very pleasant for anyone but the ring will not be affected in any negative way. So this option is the best at the moment." My face was red with now both anger and embarrassment. I had no choice but to accept defeat. She was not going to change her mind. Malfoy had been incredibly quiet so I was surprised when he finally did say something. "So we're just going to wait until I have to go to the bathroom for a whole day and night then get the ring? Don't you think that's a little bit uncomfortable on my part?" for once in my life I agreed with him. Miss Pomferey unfortunately, had other ideas. "No my boy we are not going to wait that long." She leaves for a few moments and I hear her rummaging in what sounds like a medicine cabinet. She comes back with a box of pills. Combined with what she just said it wasn't hard to figure out what the pills where. She shakes out two pills and hands them to Malfoy

He looked at her sceptically. "What are they?" He asked. Even Miss Pomferey didn't want to answer but she had to. "Well, it's a very strong laxative that will get the ring out far quicker that if we just wait." He had a disgusted look on his face as he gave the pills back to her. "No I will not be forced to do this all because of a stupid accident that wasn't even my fault. This is humiliating and degrading all for a mudbloods ring? I simply refuse." At that moment I was so mad that I could have jammed the pills down his throat for all I cared. I stomped over getting ready to do anything but I just shouted at him. "You are the most selfish person I have ever met! That ring is very important and I'm just as miserable as you are about how this is going so suck it up and swallow the darn pills!" he looked shocked for a moment but recovered quickly. "Calm down mudblood. Think if you where me, would you act any different?" for once he actually made sense. I would probably try to refuse also. I was a little annoyed because he actually made a decent point. "Well still, you really should take the pills, I mean; I know this is really embarrassing but the quicker the ring is out the better." he finally did take the pills from Miss Pomferey reluctantly but didn't put them in his mouth. "This is not going to be pleasant." He mutters under his breath. He brings the pills to his mouth slowly. I guess he was still reluctant to do this. He finally pops them into his mouth and swallows them. At first nothing happened. "Just wait a bit; normally it takes a few minutes to start showing signs of effect." Miss Pomferey told us. After a few minutes Malfoy started showing signs of discomfort. "My stomach is hurting." He moaned and clutched his stomach. Miss Pomferey nodded. "Yes that is very normal. It means the laxative is working.

He looked embarrassed. Soon he started describing the pain as it moved to his lower torso. "It really hurts." He kept complaining, I tried to act calm, even though I will never be able to wear that ring again. "Miss Pomferey, how much longer until the ring will be out?" she looks at Malfoy then at me. "Roughly another half hour." I gulp nervously. This was seriously not fun, but I had to tell myself Malfoy did have it worse than me. All of a sudden, Malfoys face went redder than I had ever seen it before. He quietly asked,

"Miss Pomferey, where is the bathroom?" she calmly pointed it out and he tried to look calm while making his way to the bathroom but I could tell there was urgency in his walk. Miss Pomferey called out, "Don't flush until we have the ring!" that made me cringe in disgust. She didn't look to thrilled either. Malfoy was in the bathroom for over fifteen minutes. Luckily we didn't have to hear anything because the bathroom was far away from where we were standing. He finally comes out still clutching his stomach.

"I think its out." He mutters. "Okay, we'll test it so brace yourself. I'm combining a cleaning charm with the summoning charm." She flicks her wand and Malfoy flinches tightly, but no pain comes instead I hear a light whizzing noise and my ring appears right in front of me looking brand new. I sighed in relief. "Can I go now?" I sighed. Finally, this mess was over. Miss Pomferey seemed relieved as well. "Yes Hermione you may go, but Malfoy must stay." He looked very annoyed and jumped up, "Why? The ring is out so why?" she makes him sit back down. "The laxative I gave you is strong and might affect you at any time today. We can't have you out of the hospital wing with you're stomach like that." He lets out a shuddery sigh. "This is such an awful day." I let out a small snicker before skipping out of the hospital wing with the ring in my pocket. "Hey Hermione!" I hear a voice call my name. "Oh hi Harry." He looks at me curiously. "What were you doing in the hospital wing?" I felt like telling him, "it wasn't me, it was Malfoy. He swallowed my ring." He looked surprised. "Really? That is so weird." I nod. "I know." He continued. "How did Miss Pomferey end up getting it out?" I answer sarcastically, "Do you really want to know?" he shudders at the thought before answering, "No."


End file.
